The Case Cracker web series is back! I’m saying that as if any one noticed its place in time and existence. But its back none the less and its all new to you so check these episodes out. The new episode should be up within a few months. 

             The alien agenda has been perplexing only those nerdy enough to care about our place in the cosmos.  Well, it’s as simple as a paper bag and fart fumes. Simply put, aliens are harvesting our farts to get high off the methane. They not only harvest our farts but also the farts of our bovine brothers, well, my brother, your hamburgers. I’m only saying this because I don’t eat meat and I’m just going to assume you do because you’re probably an American. Not only is meat bad for you but also it rots in your guts and makes your farts more mouth watering to the aliens. Going vegan or at least vegetarian is the only way to fend off these fart-sucking aliens.

            This brings me to my next point: cows are actually more intelligent than humans and have been fighting the alien invasion for years. This also explains cattle mutilation, as these are actually warriors who have fallen in battle to the business end of a laser pen. Often times the cows butthole will be cut out and warn as trophies like a G.I. Joe in the forests of Nam.

            Since cows do not give up their farts willingly, the aliens turn to meat eating, beer guzzling humans who stupidly sleep in private homes with no one on guard to make sure aliens don’t come along and put a brown bag up their butt to huff their beer marinated meat farts. The beer soaked human will fart constantly in the course of the night so the aliens tap the humans b-hole like a keg and fill up their bags like a frat boy would a red solo cup, partying away in the privacy of the humans home listening to IDM techno and gulping the sullied air.

            When the party is over, an implant is placed on the forehead of the human with a sharpie in the shape of a penis. The size of the penis is proportionate to the quality of the farts. Big penises mean awesome, smooth swallowing Beachwood aged farts and the small peni implants mean the guy is a cold fish. What about the girls you say? Well everybody knows that girls don’t fart, poo or sweat, so aliens have no use for them.  This is a rare occasion that it pays to be a women or a man with a small penis.

In this case I solve the mystery of the “Dover  Demon”. Yes, I solved it by simply throwing out semi thoughtful possibilities for what the “Demon” could have been. Yep, I will not suffer a mystery!

Also; a ghost story from about.com, your true tales “John, The Good Skeleton”

A commercial for bio-weaponry.

New short I am working on called “Toof”. It’s really nothing more than a piece that demonstrates my skills as a full motion animator but it is sill pretty funny… kinda…

Toof from Droid Ferox on Vimeo.

In this episode of The Case Cracker Podcast -  ”The Beast of Busco”, A real life Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle from the farmlands of….Churubusco… INDIANA?!! Well, this turtle isn’t as cool as a crime fighting turtle from New York trained in the Martial Arts, but, old “Oscar” does have a Sweet back tattoo! Confused? Just listen to this podcast and it will all make a little more sense.

In the “studio” working on The Case Cracker Podcast:Episode#2 “The Beast of Busco”

In this episode I delve into the case of the mysterious Michigan dogman and other doglike cryptids,also, a very interesting poltergeist case submitted by a reader from the theshadowlands.com